DVA: RISE Peer Feedback
- Sara Francis
- Jun 21, 2017
- 2 min read
Tyler,
Your video was engaging most definitely because of Kraig’s story. It was the first thing that struck me. Maybe without even realizing it, his narration used emotion and situations that a viewer could relate to. For example: how he was saying that reading and video games help him cope in difficult times. A lot of people can relate to that. It also makes the audience care about the story you are telling. I would like to try this tactic with my own videos in the future to help the audience feel more connected with my story.
Regarding your B-Roll shots, was there any reason in particular the footage was of items from different fandoms? Was it to show the many interests Kraig has? Or is it to show things that inspire him or what he hopes to accomplish as an upcoming writer?
While the dialogue and concept was awesome, I did feel like there was one thing missing. It seems like there should be a transition sentence between where he uses books and video games to cope with what he hopes to become as a writer. Maybe he could’ve explained how, because of these experiences, he was inspired to write to help others cope… or something like that. Also, I loved the B-Roll shots you took, but a few were a bit blurred. There was one part where I couldn’t read the titles of the books. I know the difficulty of shooting close up footage; so I truly admire the shots!
Overall, I enjoyed the video and Kraig’s relatable story drew me in. Perhaps you could add more emphasis by showing a shot of him writing along with reading and playing; that way we see him in action. The music also was an exceptional choice and added to the narration. This video would be great if repurposed as a testimony for those who have trouble coping. Kraig is a perfect example to show them that they can find escape in reading and games and that they’ll find their talents in due time.
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